When escaping your day job, privilege helps

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Ourselves

There is a lot of inspirational – possibly, aspirational – advice which focuses on people and their jobs. It usually goes along the lines of ‘Hate your job? Quit!’, as if it’s that easy. I mentioned on Monday that I have quit jobs in the past, and that I’m “not afraid” to quit jobs. I should have rephrased that. I’m not afraid to quit jobs because I don’t have anything to be afraid of. I have always had financial support outside of working. I have never been in debt. I don’t have any dependants. I rent, so no mortgage. These considerations are huge when it comes to deciding to stop working, and I don’t have to consider them.

A lot of people my age, and in my position, are writing these blogs and giving out this advice without having these considerations. It’s deceptively simple advice too. After all, when you start prioritising your own happiness and well-being, why should you stick it out in a position which grinds you down? Life is for enjoyment, right?! Well, it might become pretty difficult to enjoy life when you’re facing eviction, bailiffs or hungry children.

quit your job and go paint at night

Source: Devnull

Most of the jobs which I quit occurred during my time at school or Uni. I still had A-Levels, or degrees, to work towards, so quitting a job or two here or there didn’t seem that big a deal. I usually got another one soon after – and I only quit jobs which were actively upsetting me, rather than just being monotonous. I’m 25 now, and I don’t have the comfort blanket of the education system to convince me that even if I’m not getting paid, I’m still achieving. This shouldn’t be a new feeling to me since I graduated a couple of years ago, but I’m hovering at the bottom of my bank balance and I’ve just started working for myself, from home. I’m getting a little old to ask my parents for hand-outs – although I still do, I’d like to stop that.

I’m getting to that stage where it’s becoming more difficult to just up-sticks and change jobs, because I need to stick with something so that I can start saving. But it’s still always going to be easier for me to quit, because I have these safety nets of family to fall back on if I fuck up financially.

So, as someone with absolutely no experience of being in difficulties when quitting a job, I’d like to ask:

What have your experiences of quitting been like? How did you cope with any financial obligations which you had? Was it easy to find another job, or start working from home? What encouraged you to quit in the first place? How did you weight up the pros and cons?

Anyone who is unable to quit a job they dislike, for whatever reason, how do you keep yourself going? Do you have any advice for other people in a similar position?

Please do share your experiences of escaping, or not being able to escape, jobs – it would be great to hear from you.

About: Amelia Jane is Editor-in-Chief at Silence, Cupcake and also travels and takes photos at Throwaway Literature.

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  • http://twitter.com/missmarymax Mary Maxfield

    I’ve only left one job, and it was in a very thought-out, “professional” way. (Two weeks’ notice, all on good terms, etc.) As often as I’d considered quitting the job more dramatically, I needed the check. I had no other way to pay rent, buy groceries, etc. I think the worst part was that the job was so exhausting, mentally *and* physically, that I quickly lost the energy to look for a better one. And I quickly lost the energy to do things outside the job I had. Instead, I would come straight home, zone out for awhile, sleep, and go back the next day. I tried very hard to do things I loved around work — writing, unpaid internships, seeing friends, etc — but I was increasingly too tired. It’s still unclear to me how much of that was exhaustion and how much of it was depression. Regardless, it was awful, and that was the case *knowing* I’d get out of it at some point, which was not true for many of my coworkers. So yes. It’s definitely a lot easier to tell someone to quit than to understand why they can’t. It’s a lot easier to look for work when you’re job isn’t beating the crap out of you, daily. And it’s — clearly — a lot easier for (most) people with privilege to say “you’re just not trusting the universe to give you something better!” than to understand that they have privilege to risk it all, stay home, and write their book — which other people don’t have.

    • http://silencecupcake.info/ Amelia Jane

      Yeah. I left a job in retail to go to an internship which a friend set up for me – while I was working the actual job I was too busy being shattered, being stressed and, well, getting drunk, to look for or organise anything for myself. And ugh, unpaid or badly paid internships are a bane in themselves.

  • Kate

    The privilege in a lot of the lifecoaching community annoys the _crap_ outa me — right now I’m specifically thinking of the conversations that boil down to ‘if you think you can’t afford my $1500 class, it’s just because you’re not making it a priority’. With implications of lattes and such. They miss the part where $1500 is what I made in the last two months put together, and spending it on their class would have meant ‘prioritizing’ it over eating, feeding my cats, and taking Emily to the vet.

    *ranty ranty ranty*

    • http://silencecupcake.info/ Amelia Jane

      Mhmm. Also – why pay a place which has already started trying to get you to change your behaviours by using guilt as a tool?!

      • Kate

        YES. Thank you, that’s the part I was missing.

  • http://sillygrrl.com/ Sarah

    I quit my corporate job in May after a year of planning and work. I wrote about that here: http://sillygrrl.com/2012/05/22/the-escape/ I touched on the fact that lots of blogger do (or make it seem like they do) easily leave their jobs without worry. I have a mortgage and I’m a single lady…I was worried!

    • http://silencecupcake.info/ Amelia Jane

      Thanks Sarah, what a fantastic post, and well done!

  • http://twitter.com/SavvySE Caley Philipps

    I quit a job once, while living in a tiny college town, with very limited options for positions that paid more than minimum wage. I had a mortgage at the time, and that’s what lead me to accept this unwanted job in the first place and stay there as long as I did. One day I sort of snapped (not postal, just emotional) and realized I could not do this for one more day and not have it change who I was. For me, when I made this connection, that the amount of awfulness and struggle I was living with each day was changing the person I was it became easier to believe I would find something else. (Which I did.) My search for a new job switched from something that paid the mortgage to something that I loved (or at least liked) and provided me with some work life balance. For me, looking at job postings this way, allowed me to see lots and lots of job postings I would have never considered before. The job I did find was a little less money, so I had to cut back on a few things, but it didn’t even matter to me because I was happy. Funny how when we are happy we need less things, isn’t it? I’ve also stayed with some soul-sucking jobs. The way I’ve always gotten through those is reminding myself, sometimes daily, sometimes hourly, why I was choosing to keep the job. If the reason is about us, who we want to be, something we want to accomplish, a goal we have set then it becomes an “and” situation. Meaning, “this job sucks and I’m paying off my debt/figuring out what else I want to do/building my resume/making good money/working towards ______ goal.” Doesn’t matter what the “and” is as long as it’s something you want and you are choosing. Good luck to ya!!! We’ll be interested to hear what you decide!

  • http://twitter.com/SavvySE Caley Philipps

    ummm, so sorry, I seem to be effin up your comments here! Wasn’t signed in the first time and now it won’t let me delete…. Oy…..